Missing receipts? Clerical errors? We think not!
Justin guilty of illegitimate claims? Nope…
Bad pants? Absolutely.
According to our sources Justin Trudeau was never to blame for any of the claims errors and neither was his staff. An anonymous tip from a local dry cleaner came in this week. Apparently It was his pinstripe clown pants he wore as Pyjamas during his last riding that were playing tricks on him.
In an effort to prevent any further riding during this stressful time in any politicians life, Justin simply wore a “less snug” pair of slacks around the hotel room and lounge areas.
The effectiveness of these pants did the trick. His theories about rest and relaxation in a time of need were absolutely correct. The pitfall? The pants, unfortunately for Trudeau, were playing a joke of their own. Needless to say, he should have known.
Pens, hotel key cards and of course bills and receipts he placed in his pockets disappeared and reappeared in the oddest places. The anonymous drycleaner believed it was credit to the ghostly spirit that still occupied his 1950’s vintage clown Pyjama bottoms. The pants even had the power to amalgamate charges and play tricks with his staff, computer systems and e-mail.
When one of our field investigators suggested to contact The Long Island Medium, Theresa Caputo, to see if she could communicate with the pants. We found that the red and whites had fled the scene and as per usual, not a single person was available for comment from either the Trudeau or Caputo Camp.
On a side note. The editor has personally requested to point out that both Justin Trudeau and Theresa Caputo, given their hair type and proper make-up, would make great clowns.
…If ever the whole MP or Psychic Medium thing doesn’t work out, our editor is hiring for his daughters 11th birthday!
Best of luck with the revenue service and the spirit world you two!